Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

knock,knock you suck

What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

Whats worse than death? Living in Agonising pain for the rest of the life that happens to be reading this statement.

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

Why was the guy coverd in garbage. I don't know but their are a lot of homeless people that can't afford the good stuff.

Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

What's five times 10? Sixty, you retarded fuck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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