knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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how do you kill a bird? tie it to a tree throw a wasp nest at it and run the tree over with a semi filled with manure

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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Why was Harry arrested? Because he stabbed multiple children.

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What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs at noon, and 3 legs in the afternoon? A dog that got its hind legs chopped off, and then only got 1 prosthetic one.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing he died.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

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What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't. Despite losing her arms in a terrible accident as a child, Suzy persevered to become a renowned gymnast. After several turns as a champion Special Olympian, Suzy retired from sports in order to tour elementary schools as a guest speaker. She inspired thousands of disabled children across North America and was a highly-respected orator. Suzy sadly passed away in 2009 at the age of 62. She is survived by her two lovely daughters, Karen and Michelle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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