A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

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Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

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What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

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u are so............................................................................................................................................................................................gay

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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