Q: Why did the girl have dirty knees? A: Cause she was dragged through the forest and raped.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Nobody knows as humans are unable to understand the way dogs communicate.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

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I like to thumb up my own jokes.

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Whats white and sticky? Marshmellows

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Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

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what do blondes and rocks have in common? they are both material and have extension.

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Q: Why are all black people fast? A: Because the slow ones are in jail.

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Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone. He proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

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What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

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What is mary short for? Mary had an accident with a semi-truck and had to get both of her legs amputated.

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Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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hi

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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woman's rights

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Why did the little boy want to sleep with his parents in their bed on the only night in weeks they'd planned to have sex? His bedroom was on fire.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Jesus hates you this I know, because Buddha told me soo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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