What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

Your momma's so fat that she can't pass through some turnstiles and needs go through some other way with people staring and feel sad about it.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

I hate long jokes -_-

Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

A dyslexic blind man

BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because Hitler took he's parents away.

What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

Your mom's so dumb she has cancer...... oh wait that's racist

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

Why did the man stop dead in his tracks? He was on top of a land mine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...