Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

What goes 100 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. FBI who? The FBI. We have your house surrounded. Pervert.

Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

9/11

Who gets more action than my best friend Reese? My raped cousin....

Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

Why did the pedophile skip breakfast? He said that he would grab a little something on the way to work...

Q: What does a gay horse eat? A: Cheese

How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

What's the difference between an apple and a fruit? None

What do you call a black jew? Overcooked

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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