A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny

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Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

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What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

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Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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What is 5 brittish guys who can't sing and horrible music make .... one direction

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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What do you call a guy with no arms? Names.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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Two tomatoes are crossing the road. Suddenly one of them gets hit by a car. He goes "AGH!"

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A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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