the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

A seal walks into a club.

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

Q: why did the boy fall down when he was walking home? A: he was murdered.

you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

what di the black kid get 4 x-MAS nothing

Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

Intel Core Computers answer robot flavored phones at middle of june CC

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

What does greg and Ian have in common?

Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

I would have made you laugh, but that is not the point is it? Moral: What do you expect from the 4th most pointless invention?

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

Four surgeons are taking a coffee break: 1st surgeon says "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." 2nd surgeon says "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." 3rd surgeon says "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded." 4th surgeon says "I prefer Chelsea fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

1st person: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? 2nd person: I don't know 1st person: A Jew is a follower of the zionist faith and a pizza is a popular food invented in Italy and comes with your choice of several delicious toppings. 2nd person: But not all Jews follow zionism 1st person: Well some places restrict your choice of toppings. Whats your point?

A. THERE'S SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE B. WHAT?!? *PUNCH* A. IT WAS PAINNNNNNNNN

The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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