A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

what did the girl get with her blueberry waffles? blue waffles.

What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

Trump will make America great again.

How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

why was the movie rated PG 13? mild violence and sexual content

Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it doesn't have the capacity for rational thought and decision-making and was subsequently hit by a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...