What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

Why was the man scared? Because he was being attacked by a giant tiger.

A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

lol im s0 gut at spelign at engrish N u laughd n liekd diZ funi joek XDD u most LUV LE MEMEZ n EMOtikons Lol (^-^) y u guyz so st00p1d at math Wtf???!?!? 1+1=8 i m soooo smurt hahaha I <3 warrior cats n dance 2 gangnum stail wile masturbatin 2 swagbois le raeg comicz ;3!! . And now you are dying of cancer.

A father had three children Rose Daisy and Cinderblock. Rose comes up to her father and asks"daddy why am i named Rose?' the father answered"well when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head"Rose Reply's "oh thats nice" and walk's away. the Daisy comes up and ask's "Daddy! why am i named Daisy!" the Dad answered "well. when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head" Daisy Replied" oh ok i guess" and walked away. Then Cinderblock came up and asked "duuuhhhd" and the father simply replied" Shut up Cinderblock".

Why is wood brown Because wood is brown

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

How many Lepers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? People with leprosy should not be doing general house keeping.

What really killed Adolf Hitler? The gas bill

Why was the guy coverd in garbage. I don't know but their are a lot of homeless people that can't afford the good stuff.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

do you currently smoke? i hope not.

Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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