Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

whats wooden and hard a wooden floor

a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

You know what's natural? Bears.

Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

a blonde walks into a drycleaning store to get her clothes and on her way out the empoyee behind her says come again and then the blonde says shut up u nosy bitch its just toothpaste this time!!!

Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

What's the worst place to land when parachuting off an airplane? A. In the middle of an ocean B. In a war zone C. Inside an active volcano D. In a justin beiber concert

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

why did the Mexican fall and not the black man. i don't know, go ask the Asian.

Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

That moment when the best part of your life is when you get 50 friends on Facebook....

It says so on your cap.

What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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