Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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Thats a real shame. How come your eyes are red to begin with? You can use hypnosis to change the color, but if you never learned how, I am not gonna teach you.

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yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

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Women. One of the genders a human can be.

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what do you call a woman that didnt make you a sandwich? An ambulance

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

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Adele walks into a bar. The barman says she's too ugly hahahahahahahahahahhahahahha lololololololololololololol

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If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

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What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

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You say: Why did the chicken cross the road? Response: Why? (or some other answer to a different joke) You say: To get to your house! Knock, knock. Response: Who's there? You say: The CHICKEN!!!!

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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How many Jews does it take to fill a shower? As many as it does to fill an ash tray.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

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What ever happened to the bartender that asked, "Why the long face?" He was punched hard on the face for asking a stupid cliche!

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Why did the girl ask for anal? She didn't. She was raped.

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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