Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

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Why did the white guy die because he had cancer

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

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Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

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The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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