How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What would happen if hitler and winston Churchill was in a bar? The police will be called to take them away as there just laying there dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what came first the chicken or the chips

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

thumb_up thumb_down -7

My cat just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops