A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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i dont fisish anythi

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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