What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

good looking women

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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