Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

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A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

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What the problem with writing an anti-joke? Trying to not come up with a punchline.

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your momma's so fat that we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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So a horse walks into a barn.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

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what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

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why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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