Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

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why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

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What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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Whats the best things about 25 year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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Robin, get in the car!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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