What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

What do you call a black person flying an airplane? The pilot.

Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

Why did the boy go back in time? He didn't. He was mutilated by rabid apes.

Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...