What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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haha

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops