Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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What looks like Micheal Jackson but isn't Micheal Jackson A black guy

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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What's better than being rich? Not living in Kenya.

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Ps: Its "Cain" again, just for matters of security here, how did he install power wires under the basement? How are you even able to use your computer over there?

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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