Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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