what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

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Brock is a massive b00b who likes da siiiiiii

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One's For You!! :D

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Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

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What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

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I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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