What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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A man died.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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My jeans

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

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What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

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Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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