what do you call a person who rides a bike a lot? BATMAN!!! -s.s

Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

Homosexualism is so gay man

How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

Why was Barack Obama wearing a Justin Bieber T-Shirt and slapping you with a pitchfork? Because you didn't listen to me when I told you to stop doing shrooms

A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

What do you call a fat priest? Obese

What is brown and sticky? A stick

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

Dyslexia ruels!

Why did the black woman have an affair? Because she had an unsatisfying sex life, her old husband was boring, and she was curious about being with other men.

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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