What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

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Q: what do you call a man eating some chicken ? A: a hungry man (hahahahahahaha.......i should get a life)

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

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Bryson got a concussion...he died

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, you're entire family is dead.

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Two drums and a sybol fall off the edge of a cliff. They hit a random pedestrian at the bottom killing him instantly. da-dum ch

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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Q: Were did the balls go? A: In the sack.

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

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Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops