whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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A blind man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at the man for a moment, then asks : - Excuse me, sir. Are you blind ? And the blind man says : - Yes.

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What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

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masturbating on a tarc bus

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Roses are red, Violets are violet,

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Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

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Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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Q: Do these jeans make me look fat? A: No your fat makes you look fat.

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There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

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What did the cat say at his mother's funeral? Nothing. He was too grief stricken over the loss of his beloved guardian.

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How does Michael J. Fox mix his paint? He uses the paint mixing stick that is provided, for free, by most reputable hardware stores.

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Why couldn't the Asian man satisfy a woman? He was in a coma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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