toast points

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black man inside a house that is on fire? A fire fighter as well as a hero since he was probably inside the house searching for anyone who was trapped inside

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What number is funnier than 23? 24.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Where's my baby??

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops