Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

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A black man, a Mexican man, and an Asian man all walked into a bar. They proceeded to have a good time together as they were celebrating their graduation from medical school.

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

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Whats worse than an oompa loompa a black midget

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A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

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Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

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What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

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One time I masturbated by myself

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what do you call a guy who makes racist jokes? an insensitive bastard

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What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

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whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

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A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

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how many horses does it take to piss on a cat 17 beccause rape isnt real in somalia

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TWIX PAUSE!

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School

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what did the comedian tell the audience? a joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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