How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

a boy says hi.The girl says bye. The boy starts to cry.

shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, one swipe, maestrostalfos, imdesiringyourhair, i call this one the cinderella story if you HAAAAAAAAAA know what i mean, paul are you ok?

What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

What dud the dorito say to the other dorito? Nothing. Sorosis are incapable of speaking because they are doritos

whats red and black and green all over? a paint job gone bad

why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

Stephen Hawking raped your mom

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

.....Carrot Top....

what did the ginger say to the other ginger? I dont now i dont speak GINGER!!!

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Pen15

How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

What has two legs, but cant walk? Steven Hawking

If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

what's the difference between a pogo stick and a traffic cone? well for starters, traffic a cones main function is to cordon off areas or alert drivers to certain areas of road that are not to be breached and pogo sticks are used as toys to heighten bouncing. I'll stop here but the list goes on.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain. Chuck promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense.

what do you call a black person in the dark? ........invisible

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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