SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. No, the Holocaust never happened, you're an idiot.

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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The cookie monster walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why do you seem so blue?" Everyone laughed. Then the cookie monster replied "my wife died."

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A man walks up to a gay guy and says "you are socially accepted"

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You know what they say about people with big feet.......... They wear big shoes.

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What do you do when a black man points a gun at your face? you do what he tells you to do.

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A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

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What do you call a piece grass just mowed. A black person.

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what is worse the Holocaust or slavery? patantan!

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Soccer...

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how do you stop a bus? shout FOR ALLAH!

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dick can talk And it says it wants you

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If you are good at taking quizzes, you are quizzical. What are you if you are good at taking tests? Testical.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

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Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

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What did the little boy do when he dropped his ice cream? Acted very mature and requested another one from his mother

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Did you hear about the guy that dropped the soap in prison? He apparently gripped it a bit too tightly causing it to slip out of his hands, but managed to pick it up promptly and finish showering with no further incidence.

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How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered his family.

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dislike this...please.

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whats softer than a furry blanket an indian

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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