Whats big, round, and full of helium? Michaels Balloon head!

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Q: How do you win the tour defrance if you have one nut? A: Hard work and dedication.

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Why did the American run over the black man. Because he didn't see him standing there.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, it is a fairly common occurrence in Australia and normal process is carried out of evacuating the premises and calling animal control to deal with the situation.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

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What's pink and fluffy? A feather duster.

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What do you call a man that goes to work every day to provide for his family? A spoon

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dick can talk And it says it wants you

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What do you call a black man sitting on his porch in the middle of the night playing a guitar? A Musician.

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Why did Billy drop his lunchbox? Because he was mauled by a Hippo.

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Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

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A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

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Im So Hood... That When I go Shopping, I Buy Sweatshirts with Hoods

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Men, get on the boat.

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why did the child fail to make his bed? because he has downs syndrome and he is incapable of participating in everyday activities.

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What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

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Why did Jimmy's sexy teacher ask him to stay behind after class? His grades have been slipping and she expects better from her students. How anyone views her sexually is of no relevance to this situation.

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "hey. get out."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops