What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded at sea,the brunette swims 1 quarter of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns.The redhead swims 3 quarters of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns. The blonde swims half the way to shore, gets tired and swims back.

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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John lazzaro likes dick

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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Roses are red Im adopted

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops