An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

FOX News: Fair and balanced

Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back. Then look down and realize there's still an active grenade in your hand. You've just become the joke

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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