How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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.der era sesoR .eulb era steloiV .sdrawkcab nettirw saw ecnetnes sihT .yrgnuh m'I won dnA

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What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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Q: What can a black man do that a llama can't? A: Walk

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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A panda , a cheetah, a dog, a spider, and an eagle are in Antarctica.. The eagle looks around at the other baffled animals and says " What is this????? This isn't right! I'm so confused!"

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops