Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Jimmy Saville

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0 1 this is a sad sad world.

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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Jesus Christ

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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Gustavo Andrade

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops