How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human being and one is an inanimate object that people enjoy sitting on.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

A duck walks into a store and asks the clerk, "do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves. The next day, the same duck walks back into the store, and asks the clerk if they have any grapes. The clerk, slightly annoyed, says no again, and the duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back in and asks again if they have any grapes. The pissed off clerk says, "No, and if you ask again i'm gonna nail your feet to the floor. The duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back into the store, and this time he asks the clerk, "do you have any nails?" The clerk says, "Yes." The Duck leaves.

"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

Why did the american block the road? Because he just ate at Mc donalds.

Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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