Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

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What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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