How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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