Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops