My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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