How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

Men

A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

What happened to my sunglasses?

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...