What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Anti Jokes = Drained

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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