To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

There are two muffins in the oven. The first says to the other, "Its getting hot in here." The second, befuddled, replies, "AHH! A talking muffin!"

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

How do you scare a black man? You dont

A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

Have you ever treat woman like sandwich? Elephant and walrus said Jews are troubles. If six plus nine is five, chickens will eat you, saturdays.

people magazine

A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...