How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

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What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops