What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

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What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

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Want to hear a joke? I hope not because I don't know any.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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How do you fit 100 dead babies into a box? Put them into a blender.

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your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

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Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

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Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

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How do you scare a black man? You dont

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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