What's faster than a black man running with a VCR? His son with the receipt of purchase as they realize VCR's are clearly outdated and must be returned right away.

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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You look like Susan Boyle f**ked Snooki and then got hit by a truck.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

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What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

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And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

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What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

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what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

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What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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did you hear about the circus fire? it was tragic and hundreds of people were killed.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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Whats The difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull? One's a dog ones a human. 363\

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What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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