I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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*knock knock* i have diarrhea

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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2 gays monkeys walk into a bar.........

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

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Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

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Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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