What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

thumb_up thumb_down -27

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

T u r n i p s

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

thumb_up thumb_down -29

if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

deez nuts

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

24

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down -31

hi hi stop! no yes no no stop no grr lol i will get you back not if i fool grrrrrrr BOOM BOOMBOTH:GRRR BOOM BOOM lol lol both:grrrr THE END BY STICK SMOKER

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops