What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

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Q:why was steve sad? A:he had an extra penis

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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What do you call a man holding a bible? A man holding a bible. What do you call a woman holding a bible? A women holding a bible. What do you call a man and a women holding a bible? A man and a women holding a bible.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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Did you hear Whitney Houston died? Yes.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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