What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock knock. I've got a gun. Knock kn [*BANG!*] [L]

Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

Why do fat people commit suicide

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

guess what what ...

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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